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For many children with developmental disabilities, their sensory experiences and emotions are interlinked like two sides of the same coin.
For some children, a sound, touch, movement, smell, visual pattern, or unexpected change in the environment may trigger an immediate emotional reaction of fear, anxiety, frustration, anger, excitement, or withdrawal. Adult mediators need to understand that behaviors which may appear intentional or oppositional are often rooted in the child’s sensory and emotional experience rather than in measured choices or intentional actions.
For Liam, the faint sound of a drill in the distance consistently produced a chain of chaotic reactions: screaming, chewing on his shirt collar, flapping his arms, searching for an escape route, lying on the floor or the street, and violently kicking his heels onto the hard surfaces. If the drilling sound did not stop and escape was impossible, there could be self-harm or aggressive behaviors toward those nearby. Even when the drilling stopped, it sometimes took over an hour for Liam to settle down.
These reactions were the outward expression of an appraisal system that associated certain sounds with his feelings of extreme discomfort, fear, danger, and loss of control. The sound was processed not as neutral information but as an emotional experience generating immediate action.
His sensory experience rapidly activates Liam’s affective and physiological systems before he has an opportunity to evaluate what is actually happening. The sensory, the motor, and the affective systems react first. More conscious, thoughtful appraisal and responses follow later, if at all.
The range of possible sensory-emotional connections is enormous. Some children react strongly to loud or unexpected sounds such as sirens, vacuum cleaners, crowd noise, screeching tires on pavement, a baby crying, or even the hum of fans or other electrical equipment. Children may be distressed by particular textures, bright lights, flickering lights, crowded spaces, too many objects, too much movement, things that move too quickly or too slowly, that come too close, certain odors, or unexpected or unwanted touch.
Other children may seek intense sensory experiences and become emotionally unsettled when those experiences are not available. Every child develops a unique pattern of sensory preferences, sensitivities, and emotional responses based on their individual nervous systems and life experiences.
These reactions can appear puzzling or disproportionate to others. A crying infant may evoke concern or discomfort in some people but trigger intense distress in a child whose nervous system experiences the sound as overwhelming.
A child may become frightened, confused, or physically distressed by certain sounds in certain contexts, and attempt to run away, cover their ears, become agitated, or even lash out physically. Such responses are the result of the child’s sensory and emotional appraisal system operating at maximum sensitivity. The child’s nervous system is reacting as though an urgent threat is present, even when the environment is objectively safe.
Some children may exhibit extreme and persistent startle responses. Experiences that most individuals gradually habituate to continue evoking strong reactions long after repeated exposure. A light touch, an unexpected sound, or a minor sensory event may repeatedly trigger the same level of alarm. These deeply ingrained sensory-emotional pathways may be extremely difficult for the child to regulate independently.
Other children develop quite different behavioral patterns that may also be part of their sensory-emotional appraisal systems serving similar regulatory functions. Rather than having extreme avoidance or aggressive responses, they may become intensely attached to particular objects or repetitive behaviors. These objects may gradually become tools for self-regulation.
Cristiano habitually looked for and collected rubber bands in every new environment. He manipulated them and wrapped them around his finger during periods of stress or uncertainty. Giulio carried empty snack bags, bottles, pieces of fabric, or other highly preferred items, held them close to his body, or flapped them in the air.
These objects and repeated actions provided safety through familiarity, consistency, and doing something that gave him a sense of regulation and maybe purpose. In a world that often felt overwhelming or unpredictable, they helped reduce his emotional arousal and restored a sense of understanding and control.
When a child repeatedly seeks a particular object, movement, sound, or sensation, they may be attempting to manage sensory input or emotional states that they cannot yet regulate through language or reasoning. What appears to be an unusual habit may actually be a tool or adaptation the child developed to maintain emotional stability and feel safe and connected.
Feeling unwell, changes, transitions, differences in time, space, sequence or pattern, and social, communication and learning activities may be quite stressful experiences for many children.
Learning requires attention, engagement, curiosity, flexibility and a willingness to tolerate uncertainty. It involves making mistakes until understanding and mastery is achieved. But these faculties and skills are interrupted or blocked when a child’s sensory and emotional systems are overwhelmed.
A child who is struggling to manage the flicker and sounds of fluorescent lights, the movement of classmates, the texture of classroom materials, or the unpredictability of a new activity may have little cognitive capacity left for learning. Adults may focus on the child’s inattention, noncompliance, avoidance or behavioral difficulties, while the child is experiencing distress and battling to regulate their sensory and emotional arousal.
When negative sensory and emotional experiences are better regulated, children are more available for change and for learning. They can devote greater attention to exploration, curiosity, communication, problem-solving, social interaction, and perseverance.
More effective parenting, caregiving, teaching, and therapy should begin with careful observation of the child’s sensory-emotional state and their own. Understanding what increases arousal, what reduces it, what provides comfort, and what creates distress offers important insights as to why learning succeeds in some situations and fails in others.
Intervention cannot eliminate every discomfort or remove every sensory trigger from a child’s life. Nor should it attempt to do so. The more meaningful goal is to help the child gradually understand and regulate the relationship between their sensory experiences, their emotions, and behaviors.
Trusted adults can support children in recognizing what the child is feeling in their bodies, what they are feeling during their emotional reactions, what they are feeling as they witness emotional reactions of others.
With these deeper, more nuanced understandings, adult mediators can develop more effective ways of helping the child deal with their world and with their stunned, overloaded sensations and emotions.
This process begins within trusted interpersonal relationships in which the child feels connected, safe, understood, and respected. The development of meaningful and reliable two-way communication enables the child to share experiences, seek support, and participate more actively in understanding and managing their own emotional and sensory world.
Progress typically occurs through repeated experiences with committed, inspirational, and empathic mediators. The child and adult enjoy being with each other, sharing intentions, feelings and successes. And they learn the advantages of approaching challenging or unpredictable situations together.
Adult caregivers and mediators discover with the child sensory supports that help provide clarity, understanding, comfort and regulation.
Opportunities and mediated participation in a broad spectrum of real-life activities each day and each week help the child develop confidence as they learn to successfully manage changes, transitions, disappointments, and surprises.
Over time, children can learn to recognize and manage intense emotional states such as anxiety, frustration, anger, or sadness before these emotions become overwhelming. They begin to anticipate what may happen next, make plans, solve problems, and use sensory and cognitive strategies to restore calm when stress rises. In this way, sensory regulation, emotional regulation, communication, and learning become increasingly integrated, allowing the child to participate more fully and successfully in daily life.
For Liam, sensory processing and emotional regulation became better integrated when language was added to the process.
The sound of the drill still produced an immediate sensory and emotional reaction, but he gradually learned to tell himself, “The noise of the drill can’t hurt me.” Liam’s mantra-like statement was not to deny his feelings. Rather, it provided another pathway for processing the sensory and emotional experience. It helped him refocus his mind and regain control.
Alongside the automatic sensory and emotional alarm response, a calmer, more reflective appraisal began to develop. Over many repetitions, supported by trusted adults and informal peer activities, Liam gradually learned that his initial feeling of danger did not always trigger extreme emotions or require immediate actions.
When Liam was engaged in enjoyable experiences with peer companions who were not bothered as much as Liam by sensory triggers, he copied their more regulated responses when occasional sensory-emotional triggers did arise. At home hours later, Liam spontaneously said, “Miri’s not afraid. Miri is brave.”
Every child develops a unique pattern of sensory-emotional connections. Understanding these connections allows parents, teachers, and therapists to move beyond the surface behaviors and better relate to the child’s subjective experience.
As we recognize that sensory events are often filtered through powerful emotional triggers and personal meanings, we become better able to support regulation, learning, and development.
Copyright © 2025 Shlomo Chaim
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